The first date – Gentlemen, start your engines!

Ah, that all important first date. Is it that ‘dreaded’ first date that your anxiety will hate or that ‘exciting’ first date that you cannot wait for? Either one depends on the type of personality that you are; but if you follow these simple tips and advice, no matter what your personality is like, you will enjoy a potent mixture of elevated feelings on your first date.


  • Stop being such a ‘nice’ guy that goes out of his way to do something ‘nice’ for the potential partner. This might be avoiding saying or doing anything that your date will disagree with; or lying/manipulating to please the other person. Women do not want a lapdog who obeys their every command and whim. They want someone strong who can make independent decisions and stick with it.
  • Be as normal as you can, emphasize on the normal. Do not try to be anything other than the real you. Take her somewhere normal and convenient where both of you feel comfortable. For example, take her out to a small and local restaurant or a sort of wine bar which tend to me quieter and less crowded. This way it will be more intimate and give a chance for the two of you to do some real talking.
  • Show up on time! Remember how important first impressions are, we don’t want the lady to think that we are taking her and her time for granted.
  • Dress well, take care of your appearance. Women love a man who takes pride in their appearance.
  • Compliment her in an honest, kind and in a way that she will feel comfortable. Don’t get too overzealous with your comments unless you want her running for the hills. Keep the compliments classy and fun. Be polite, not pushy.
  • Have the patience to be a good listener. Women love a guy who can listen to and show a genuine interest to what the are saying.
  • Keep your conversations light and fun. Nothing too heavy or too risqué. Women are more emotional and may feel things differently than you do.
  • If you are a real gentleman, offer to pay at the end of the date, even if she doesn’t expect it. It is the traditional and chivalrous thing to do, again, women love that!
  • Do not try to impose any commitment. Take your time and be a friend to her. All great relationships stem from a true and real friendship.
  • Show your sensitive side! Women adore and respect a man who is not afraid to show his real feelings. I told my current girlfriend on our first date that my life was a total mess! She later told me that she admired me for being honest and self-aware.

I hope these simple guidelines will help you have more refined first date and move you closer in your journey to find a soul mate! A dating service like ‘Lightning Speed Matchmaker’ can help you meet people with similar interests and lifestyles. Have a great first date and remember to have fun! For more information about their membership plans, please visit their site at and request your FREE consultation today.

Article written by Don Sahan, a contributing author for Lightning speed blog.