Even with old traditions and social etiquette quickly vanishing from sight- and the modernity of the globe quickly emerging from its surface, the role of men in relationships and the social stigma which is extremely prominent still remains.
Whether it be the generalization that was customary from its very beginning that men are indeed, the more superior figure as opposed to women – hence needing to override their actions and conform to peer pressure in order to please women, or is it merely the fact that guys are generally more thoughtful which makes them prompt to perform more gestures?
In order to cultivate positivity and an open space for both parties to express their deemed love for each other and to ensure a safe platform for both individuals to get equal opportunities to express their acknowledgment for each other, the social stigma as to whether which gender should perform slightly more for the other person should be eradicated by all means.
There should be a greater promotion of the individualism for both genders- coming into terms that the relationship should work in a two-way basis- hence both individuals would need to add fuel to the fire to ensure that the momentum will withlast. There should not be a certain prerequisite for men to serve women nor should women be of hindrance to men.
There has always been social expectations for women/ men to perform a certain way. For instance, men are usually required to pay the bills after every date, men are usually obligated to ask you to prom or obligated to start the first move. A repetitive cycle of this would result in men having to conform to peer pressure which would highly affect their well being as an individual leading to a distress in the relationship which would most likely cause a nemesis in the tangibility of one’s relationship. Whatever the outcome may be, I assure you it will not be very appealing in sight.
Just an analogy, imagine a swing. If there is an added weight on one side but not on the other, the swing will not balance no matter how much you wish for it to. It’s simple physics- causing one side to be placing more effort than required whilst the other not putting any effort at all. This simple analogy applies very critically to relationships- both parties should be putting the utmost effort possible to ensure the most efficient mechanism for both sides.
The fact that this traditional method of approaching relationships has become exceedingly imperative over the years, it has already been embedded into the minds of ours that men should be the one performing much more than women, the fact that men are obliged to be the domineering figure as this is the determinant as to whether a relationship will last, the fact that men should be the one earning cold hard cash for his family while women are required to pat their porcelain faces clear to ensure that they meet a certain beauty standard that is expected of every women in status quo.
The only way to go about this issue and the best way to approach it is to promote the necessity for both parties to have an equal space and opportunity to perform their own acts- if this practice plummets and more and more people take this advice into consideration, the disparity of the mechanisms of relationships will hopefully be less prominent. Keep encouraging- keep spreading love for both parties- and encouragement is definitely a key factor to spearhead a new way of thinking and approaching these situations.
Written by : Sandra Leow